"There is no Passion to be found PLAYING SMALL, in settling for a LIFE that is less than the one you are capable of Living.....
Red Solar Dragon, Nelson Mandala

Sunday, July 24, 2016

The Art of Surrendering

Often times, the greatest peace comes from Surrender..... 

I have notice so many more type A people running around like a chicken with their head cut off.  They always are trying to accomplish something.  Sometimes they are successful and other times not so much. But, they are driven beyond measure often sacrificing everything and everyone to achieve their goal. I think this topic is more for them then the rest of us but, even though I am not a type A personality the Universe has taught me a thing or two about the art of surrendering.

I guess it becomes really important when you just allow things to happen instead of making them happen.  This sounds so much better and easier but really it is not.  We are told that we need to have goals and dreams and inspirations and all those sorts of things and they are important in the whole scream of things but they are also very tricky and force you to focus on things that may not be as important in your life as you think.  Because the bottom line is the journey and not the destination.  I don't mean that you should not dream and put your dreams into action.  It is more about how you put your dreams into action and your focus when you are working your plan.

It is important to understand that we are in a partnership with the Universe. And we do have a preconceived Destiny which is always in play.  Sometime it can feel as if we are pieces on a chess board and just being moved around.  So it is important to know and understand what your Destiny is so that all your plans and dreams are in alignment with your Destiny.  Great thought also not so easy to know and develop but so necessary. 

I remember when I was living in Arizona and it was approaching the time for me to leave.  I want so desperately to move to California.  I tried so hard to get my massage license activated there and there was one road block after another for a process that should have been relatively easy.  I thought I would be able to move in with a relative and that did not work out.  So after months of trying and things not working out, I decided that I would just go back home to DC and start over there.  It turned out to be a better fit although that was not easy, it was better and the effort that I was making to move to California  was more then the effort I needed to move to DC.  When I decided to go home it was as if the heavens open up and welcomed me and everything became very easy and pliable.  I had surrendered.

1. We try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t.

In other words, control is rooted in fear.

2. Control is also a result of being attached to a specific outcome—an outcome we’re sure is best for us, as if we always know what’s best.

When we trust that we’re okay no matter what circumstances come our way, we don’t need to micro-manage the universe. We let go. And we open ourselves to all sorts of wonderful possibilities that aren’t there when we’re attached to one “right” path. 

3. The energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control.

I suspect it’s slightly different for everyone, but here’s what control mode looks and feels for most people: Your vision gets very narrow and focused, my breath is shallow, adrenaline is pumping and your heart rate increases.
Your mind shifts from topic to topic and from past to future very quickly, and you have little concentration, poor memory, and almost no present-moment awareness.
In surrender mode, We are calm, peaceful. Breathing deeply, present in the moment. we see clearly and our vision extends out around us, allowing us to (literally) see the bigger picture.
So the great irony is that attempting to control things actually feels less in control. When we micro-managing and obsessing over details, we know we are in our own way. 

The Art of Surrender

Surrender literally means to stop fighting. Stop fighting with yourself. Stop fighting the universe and the natural flow of things. Stop resisting and pushing against reality.
Surrender = Complete acceptance of what is + Faith that all is well, even without my input.
It’s not about inaction. It’s about taking action from that place of surrender energy.
If letting go of control and surrendering not only feel better, but actually produce better results, then how do we do that?
Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go—consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy.
One person described to me of what it feels like when they become aware that they in control mode, they imagine that they are in a small boat paddling upstream, against the current. It’s hard. It’s a fight. That’s is what control mode feels like to them.
When they choose to let go and surrender, they visualize the boat turning around, they drop the oars, and floating downstream. They are being gently pulled, no effort necessary on there part. Simply breathing and saying, “Let go of the oars” is usually enough to get them to surrender.
Sometimes it’s a little harder to make the shift from control to surrender. Here are a few questions that can help: 

1. What am I afraid will happen if I let go of control?

When you pinpoint the fear, question its validity. Ask yourself, Is it true? If you’re afraid the night will be ruined if your boyfriend doesn’t remember to pick up eggplant (and you’ve already reminded him fourteen times), question that assumption.
Can you really know the night would be ruined without the eggplant? And if it would be ruined (by your definition, anyway), what’s so bad about that? 

2. Find out whose business you’re in.

Your business is the realm of things that you can directly influence. Are you there? Or are you in someone else’s business? When we’re trying to control things outside of our own business, it’s not going to go well. 

3. Consider this: Would letting go feel like freedom?

It almost always would. Let that feeling of freedom guide you toward loosening your grip.

A Friendly Universe

Einstein said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”  I believe in a friendly universe. Being receptive and allowing things to happen is a skill that can be practiced and improved upon. It helps to believe in a friendly universe—one that is supporting you at every turn so that you don’t have to worry yourself over the details. We can always choose to do things the easy way or the hard way. We can muscle through, or we can let go of the oars and let the current carry us downstream. There is a peaceful, yet focused energy that accompanies holding the intention of what I want, but not forcing myself to do it. That energy is magic. I’m still a work in progress, but I’m allowing it to become a habit instead of making it a habit.

In Lak'esh (I am another yourself)  Much love to you as you surrender to what is.....

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