"There is no Passion to be found PLAYING SMALL, in settling for a LIFE that is less than the one you are capable of Living.....
Red Solar Dragon, Nelson Mandala

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Redefining Relationships

I have been married twice and I got to tell you that I am thinking about how I feel about doing it again.  The difference this time is that I finally have learned so much about myself and what I am looking for in a relationship and what I want in my life.  I know, maybe I should have known this so much earlier since I am now 50 something.  But one can not dictate when they will learn a certain thing.  Most things do come with age, I have to tell you and from life relationships. Living is such a precious gift with so many layers of unwinding to understand the core of things.  I know when we are young we miss the deepest parts of ourselves and life.  We get so caught up in the delicious part of youth that we often fail to get to the juicy part of life and living.  

I was listening to a radio program the other day and the women on the program had lost her three children in a house fire as well as her parents.  Of all the things she spoke about on the show what struck to my core was things that she realized where the most important to her.  She worked a lot when her kids were alive and she really would have liked to spend more time with them.  Giving them things was not as important as giving them her time.  Getting them in better schools just did not seem like that was the true foundation of loving them.  We spend so much time doing things for our family to secure their future instead of just being with them and teaching them through love and compassion.  We can be better at loving and just showing up.  Some times you just have to look at the whole picture and not what is just in front of your face.  Where is it that the family is going, what is the direction, are we on the same page and what will it take to get there.  You have to let go of the ego and embrace the divine spirit in your relationships, it is so important.  I know that the place in between is so much more interesting the one side or the other.  The place in between brings in the possibilities to create meaningful existence and relationship.  It is the place of the opening, it is the place of no-thing.

There is a place between it's all about you or it's all about me
between I am everything or I am nothing
between connection or independence
between pleasure or stillness
between doing or being
between shadow or light
between privacy or transparency
between easy or hard 
between giving or receiving
between staying or going
between the shallow or the deep end
between screaming or silence
between boundary or chaos
between control or surrender to unknown
between fear or excitement(willingness)
between depth in monogamy or depth in open relating

my intention is let go enough, be open to all sides/forms enough that the yes/and place finds me.
I'm done chasing it AND/yet am open to it looking/feeling more than I could ever imagine. Don't settle for the more of the same, create your relationship with your partner.  It does not matter if it does not look like other relationship.  Any relationship should bring forth growth, trust, intimacy.  They should be fun, and explorative and unimaginable and peaceful and joyful.  They should take you to heights that you never thought possible, they should be all encompassing.  And if they are not then you to sit down and give it a lot of thought be the Divine is everything and that is what you want, EVERYTHING!!!

In La'Kesh, (I am another yourself)  Peace, Love and Redefining Relationships

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